Goal setting is about process and discipline, so much so that many adults struggle with setting and achieving goals (speaking from personal experience). Yet the research is clear, that setting goals is a critical step in realizing our full potential and achieving the success we desire for ourselves. In January 2023, according to Gallup, nearly 70% of Americans were committed to setting goals. It is an incredibly popular search keyword in Google, with over 700 million results in Google alone. 

I’m sure when you start to think of helping your student set some goals, it starts to feel overwhelming. Where do you start? How do I help them? What kinds of goals should they set?

In my experience, adolescents spend some time thinking deeply about their place in the world (even if they don’t share it with you). Many imagine what their future might look like; some aspire to achieve recognition for their achievements; others are interested in learning and developing important skills; yet others go further, contemplating how they might make a positive difference in the world. However your student defines success, I firmly believe it can be achieved through hard work and setting some goals. 

Goal Setting & Brain Development

First things first. Goal setting is, for most, a taught skill, not an innate one. It requires students to use executive functioning skills, which is near impossible for them.

According to the Cleveland Clinic, “Executive function, which occurs in the frontal lobe of the brain, refers to mental processes that help you set and carry out goals. You use these skills to solve problems, make plans, and manage emotions.”

The Clinic goes on, sharing that “the frontal lobe is the largest part of the brain, and is located right behind the forehead. It governs behavior, emotions, executive functions, language, social skills, memory, and thinking.”

Here’s the rub. The frontal lobe continues developing through adolescence, becoming fully developed sometime around our mid-20’s. This is why we tend to make more questionable decisions as adolescence, struggle with time management, and experience extreme emotional highs and lows. It’s also important to note that executive functions are further complicated by students with executive function learning disabilities.

6-Step Goal Setting Process

With some brain science now in your parenting tool-box, you are partially equipped to help your student set some goals. The next part is having a step-by-step process that you can use as a guide. While setting goals is hard for students, I assure you with this 6-step guide it’s something they can do with your guidance and support.

Step 1: Goal Setting Starts with Self-Reflection 

Professors James Baily and Scheherazade Rehman write in their 2022 Harvard Business Review article, “Research shows the habit of reflection can separate extraordinary professionals from mediocre ones.” Personally, I don’t think it’s a far stretch to replace “professionals” with “students.” 

Though like goal setting itself, self-reflection is a skill unto itself. To help students get started I have them ask themselves some deep questions. As they start to answer them, I ask that they write their reflections down, as it helps with the next steps.

Here are the questions that I start with, adjusting and expanding as needed:

• Where do I see myself in 5 years?
• What do I want to accomplish by the end of the year?
• What are things I do well?
• What are things I want to get better at?

Step 2: Goal Setting Categories

One of the challenges that I think many students face with goal setting is what the goals should be about. That’s why I have students focus on writing 3 goals: academic, extracurricular, and personal. Can they go beyond that? Of course. That said, it’s important to consider what is possible to achieve within the year.

The reason for those 3 categories is more based on experience than anything else. I find it allows students the freedom the need in setting goals, while providing enough direction that the goal-setting experience is manageable. 

So after they’ve done their deep self-reflection, I have students organize their thoughts into the 3 goal categories: academic, extracurricular, and personal.

Step 3: Drafting Goals

Once they have some ideas, it’s time to start writing. This will take time and care, as it means writing down their complex ideas. When it comes to witing goals, there are a lot of different methods, and one isn’t better than another. It’s all about what works best for the student. 

When I work with students I use the SMART methodology. I find it’s the easiest to explain, simplest for students to understand, and I’ve had a lot of success with it. SMART stands for: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Timely.

Let’s look at an example. I’d like to introduce you to my imaginary student Angel. Angel is a high school sophomore who dreams of going to college. Angel typically earns A’s, B’s, and C’s. With their desire to go to college, Angel knows their grades will need to be more consistent and at least in the B+ range. So they write the following academic goal:

By the end of the school year I want to earn a B+ or higher in all of my classes.

Let’s see if it passes the SMART test:

• Specific – it’s focused on improving or maintaining grades in all of Angel’s classes
• Measurable – goal is measured by grades earned
• Achievable – given Angel’s current grades and the time-frame, I’d say this is achievable
• Realistic– with Angel’s age, college aspirations, time line, and current performance this is definitely realistic
• Timely – The goal is centered on Angel’s performance over the course of the school year, giving them sufficient time to achieve it

Step 4: Action Steps

With their SMART goals written down, I find it’s helpful for students to map out some key action steps to achieve the goal. I help them figure that out by having them complete the following sentence: In order to accomplish this I will… (and that gets written into the goal).

If we revisit Angel’s goal, some actions step examples might be:

In order to accomplish this I will…

• Spend 2 additional hours per week studying,
• Attend all extra help and study sessions prior to tests and quizzes,
• Meet with my teachers to discuss different study & homework strategies and techniques.

Step 5: Review & Revise

Anytime I work with students on writing, I find it’s useful to have someone else (other than the 2 of us) read it over. Reviewers help clarify thoughts and ideas, and catch spelling and grammatical errors. 

Step 6: Goal Setting Check-in

Whether it’s weekly, monthly, or quarterly, students need to monitor their progress. These check-ins are incredible opportunities for them to make adjustments, celebrate successes, and learn from failures!

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